Thanks to our lovely friends at Comcast, I had a two-week Internet vacation.  Without going too much into particulars, I just felt the need to get a post up here, considering even Ricky had posted since my last visit.

Ricky, for Christ’s sake.

While I can’t speak for my comrades, I would like to apologize for my absence.  I was unable to gain access to CWAMB for a number of weeks, thanks to the McAfee Security Suite on my computer upgrading into an unholy monolith of PC hyperprotection.  It wouldn’t even go away when I tried to uninstall it.

“I have pwned you… wait, what are you doing, Matt?” (image courtesy of menstech.com)

Thanks to the expertise of Matt, that presence is gone.  I’ll be back to harp on 38fathead, Lamar, and more soon enough.

This one goes out to Notre Dame fans, those easily offended and the staff of ESPN 950…

We don’t really think Charlie Weis eats babies, nor did he eat any of our babies (if we had any, we’re all unmarried schmucks) at any time. The name came from a funny conversation cracking on a picture of Weis that was frontpaged at ESPN.com sometime last fall. Mr. Weis is a fine, upstanding individual and a hell of a football coach. The name is just funny. We don’t hate Notre Dame. … well, okay, maybe some of us do. But anyway, no need to be offended. If you want to be offended by your sports blogs I can make a couple recommendations. Now those dudes know offensive.

So anyway, thanks for the link from your blogs page ESPN950. It’s awesome you know who we are and felt us worth enough to let other Indy sports fans know about us. Personally I think you’re loads better than 1260AM (if only I could pick you up all the time on the north side.) But no need to be offended. Really. We’re nice people. Mostly. Just a little… off.

Alright enough of the esoteric and Indy-centric meta crap. How ’bout them Sabres? I’ve really been meaning to do more hockey blogging and will definitely pick it up as the rounds progress. From the games I’ve seen the Sabres look great, the Red Wings look good when their power play shows up, Sid The Kid fizzled in the first round and I really really want to see a Buffalo vs. Ottawa matchup next round since the bad blood between the teams earlier in the season. What’s better than a regular season goalie fight? A playoff one, of course.

*10 points to whomever can name the band that the title of this post is referencing

In addition to being Groundhog Day, February 2 is also the birthday of C.J., one of the more prolific contributors here at CWAMB. In observance of this event (and because he reminded everyone of it in his last article), and in keeping with my borderline neurotic obsession with middle infielders of the 1980s, I feel it is also my duty to re-educate the general sports public with the career of former shortstop Roland Americo “Buddy” Biancalana, born February 2, 1960.

“Hey kids! I’m only the second biggest whore today! Happy Birthday, Buddy!” (image courtesy of groundhogcrossing.com)

Biancalana broke into the majors in 1982, but didn’t stick around for any real length of time until 1984. Standing 5′11″ and checking in at 160 pounds, he wasn’t much of a hitter, as his .205 career batting average and six home runs will attest to. He only had eight career steals, so he didn’t make The Show because of his speed. Frankly, he wasn’t much of a fielder, either… Buddy’s career fielding percentage was .945, at a time when the league’s shortstops’ percentage was twenty points higher. In fairness, he was a fairly adequate second baseman, in limited duty there.

Buddy was a switch-hitter. Of course, one can argue that it really didn’t matter which side of the plate he was batting from.

Obviously, Buddy was able to play the “underdog” card, but the people of Kansas City still love him because of what I like to call The Jim Leyritz Rule. He was in the right place at the right time. Taking over for a slumping Onix Concepcion, Buddy was the starting shortstop during the 1985 postseason, during which the Royals knocked off the favored Toronto Blue Jays in the ALCS, and defeated their heavily-favored cross-state rivals, the St. Louis Cardinals in the World Series. It’s the only World Series title Kansas City has ever won, and it’s still celebrated to this day. While Buddy’s .250 (9 for 36, combined) postseason batting average and three RBIs might not be considered a huge run for most, when you consider that he had hit .188 with six RBIs in 183 at-bats during the regular season it’s pretty Herculean. He knocked in the game-winning RBIs in Game 6 of the ALCS and Game 5 of the World Series. Buddy would actually have his best season in 1986, batting .242 with two homers and eight RBI in 190 at-bats, but the Royals Dynasty was not meant to be. After the 1987 season (which concluded with a dismal 1-for-24 run with the Houston Astros) and a failed attempt to catch on with the Atlanta Braves the following spring, Buddy hung up the cleats.

I know, I miss the banner graphic too. The WordPress upgrade I just did seems to have fiddled with my theme. I’ll hopefully have it all back to normal tonight.

Update: Fixed. Wasn’t as serious as I feared.

Welcome to Charlie Weis Ate My Baby. Things are still pretty new around here and we’re still trying to get our staff of writers (drunken boozers who will write for free) together. Stay tuned, should be fun!