Via Deadspin, Billy Packer admits what we already knew or strongly suspected.

So these videos have already made some of the rounds but I just had to post them as well. First off, the crazy finish of the NCAA Division II Men’s Basketball Championship.

That’s some Reggie Miller vs. the Knicks shit right there.

And then The Hated Pistons(tm) with a crazy, luckiest-shot-ever by ol’ Sheed from over half court to tie a game (that they eventually won)

The sad thing about my hatred for the Pistons is that anymore I hate the Pacers too (not for the same reasons, obviously. ANd I am still a ‘fan’… mostly… sorta). The NBA. It’s FAAAAAAAAANtastic.

Enough was enough for Tubby Smith in Lexington. Smith will be announced tomorrow as the new head coach for the University of Minnesota, ending his 10-year tenure at Kentucky. The only sad part of this is that the majority of Wildcat fans will applaud the move. Say what you will about Tubby, but he had to be tired of hearing his name whispered as the victim of a potential ousting after every season. Most ‘Cat faithful will be glad to get someone else in, some others will scream about how Smith “abandoned” the program, but the truth is that Tubby can walk away from Rupp arena held high. His teams were always well-coached and sometimes achieved more than the talent they had would have dictated under an ordinary coach. In terms of X’s and O’s, he’s easily one of the best basketball coaches on the planet.

“HAW-haw! Fire THIS, you rat bastards! Now, I shall cleanse myself in the waters of Lake Minnetonka.” (image courtesy of siouxcityjournal.com)

Oh, and he won a national title in 1998. God forbid anyone remembers that. Much happiness to you in Gopherland, Tubby, you’ve earned it. A quick word of advice, though… get someone on that bench of yours to recruit. Of course, being in a situation where kids aren’t worried about their coach getting fired for a “mere” 22-win season will probably help things in that regard.

While we’re on the subject of coaches that the locals will be happy to see go, Steve Alford has reportedly told his Iowa players that he’ll be taking the head coaching job at New Mexico. Alford led his Hawkeyes to only three NCAA Tournaments in his eight seasons and won only one tournament game in those appearances. Notably, his third-seeded team lost to fourteenth-seeded Northwestern State in last year’s tourney. My bracket still stings from that one. “Sleeper Elite Eight team” my butt. The important thing is, I’m not bitter. Eight seasons of mediocrity from a team that the locals live and die with is enough to wear out just about anybody’s welcome, so Alford (probably correctly) decided that this was a good time to start fresh and move on. He’s been a guy who gets a lot out of hard-working, less-talented clubs, so New Mexico should be better for his hiring there.

“Don’t you worry, Bloomington rednecks, I’ll always be in your hearts!” (image courtesy of illinireport.com)

Finally, Duke sophomore forward and local boy Josh McRoberts declared himself eligible for the NBA Draft today, capping off a surprisingly big day in non-game NCAA action. I’ll go easy on the kid, because my dad thinks he’s a good guy (he works at Carmel High School, McRoberts’ alma mater). Honestly, McRoberts could stand one more year of seasoning, this time as Duke’s #1 offensive option, but he’ll do okay in the pros. Scoring 18 per game next year won’t help his standing too much. He’ll be a rotation player and hang around the NBA for a long time because he rebounds, defends, passes, and has a great basketball IQ. Is he an All-Star? No. One or two more years at Duke won’t change that, so he might as well have his moderate payday as a low first-round pick now. To his credit, he’s better offensively than Joakim Noah. Then again, so is Flea from the Red Hot Chili Peppers.
All this means is Danny Ainge may have to trade down to appease the basketball gods (or just CJ), so McRoberts can attain his rightful place in history.

Readers from the beginning of CWAMB know my feelings about Bill Simmons. But he’s dead on in his column about Billy Packer.
For as long as I cam remember, it’s been Billy Packer calling the biggest tournament games, being condescending to anyone with an opinion different than his and basically being a humorous drag on the game. Simmons explains why it’s been “for as long as I can remember”

“Billy Packer has provided color for every Final Four game and every NCAA championship game since 1975.”

That’s right. For longer than I’ve been alive, Packer has been calling NCAA games. That’s a frightening thought in itself. But Simmons goes further and to me writes on of his best columns (he’s usually good when he stays away from any topics involving Boston).

“Here’s the problem: Packer loves basketball a little too much. He doesn’t grasp its entertainment value simply because he can’t see it.
…
Look, we spend way too much time complaining about the sports media. If you don’t like a certain writer, don’t read him. If you don’t like a certain radio show, don’t listen. If you don’t like a certain studio analyst, turn the channel. It’s that simple.

Packer’s case is different, though. Many people (including me) believe he’s a humorless know-it-all and a curmudgeon, and we’re exhausted by his schtick. But because he announces the most important college games every spring, he can’t be avoided.”

Indeed. Credit where credit is due. Simmons nailed this one.

…speaking of nailing it, there was this time me and my buddies Bish and House where in Vegas and House nailed a blackjack against a dealer they brought out to be The Closer. It was like that scene in [insert pop culture reference here]….

On Friday Mike pointed me to Bill Simmons’ liveblogging of the first round of the NCAA tournament, and I have to say it’s a great read, totally hilarious. But to me the best thing about it was that it may as well have been borrowed from my own place on Thursday and Friday, down to the same joke themes and everything.

This year was the third year of the recent annual tradition of my friends and me gathering at my apartment downtown for the first round of the tournament. Indianapolis historically has a large St. Patrick’s Day parade which begins at the streetcorner closest to my apartment, and the bar next door to my building celebrates with a massive drunken party which spills out into the blocked-off street. When I moved in down here and we realized this, and that it coincides with the start of the tournament, a tradition was born, even if it involved using vacation days from work. This year marked the first with my new high-def TV, thus insuring an upgrade to the experience.

And now that Simmons has introduced me to tournament liveblogging, I may totally have to do this next year. My friends are at least as funny as his. You name the joke theme from his liveblogging, and we hit it. From the bashing of CBS’s inconsistent HD feed, to mocking Kellogg’s inexplicable Stanford pick, to trashing the commercials (and yes, particularly the incessant “this is our country” song), to mocking the players and coaches, and so forth (one Simmons and company missed that you’d have to be from Indiana to get, Josh McRoberts must wind up a Celtic. With a career of Carmel High School to Duke to Boston, this would cement his legacy as the whitest player in basketball history… Or “Monsignior Award” winner Jared Dudley, for having “the tightest collar in the tournament.)

Much fun. Hell, I may need to liveblog all group watching of sporting events in my apartment from now on. Maybe we can get Mike a job at ESPN.

Oh, my picks… Not doing too bad, and my final four is all still alive. Florida, Kansas, Texas, and Ohio St., with OSU beating Kansas for the title. Of course this bracket is doomed, as I didn’t realize until I had submitted it that I had picked Kansas, the chokingest team in recent NCAA history, to go far. Oops. As for today’s games, Go Boilers! It’s of course pretty unlikely that they’ll knock off the Gators, but I can dream. We will miss you Carl Landry.

(from the Terre Haute Tribune-Star sometime in 1997-1998)

So the Madness begins in about an hour or so. It’s time to bust out my horrible picks for the first round. Guaranteed to make me look like a fool and lose you money!

Midwest
(1) Florida over (16) Jackson State
(8) Arizona over (9) Purdue
(12) Old Dominion over (5) Butler
(4) Maryland over (13) Davidson
(11) Winthrop over (6) Notre Dame
(3) Oregon over (14) Miami OH
(10) Georgia Tech over (7) UNLV
(2) Wisconsin over (15) Texas A&M

West
(1) Kansas over (16) Niagra
(9) Villanova over (8) Kentucky
(5) Virginia Tech over (12) Illinois
(4) Southern Illinois over (13) Holy Cross
(6) Duke over (11) VCU
(14) Wright State over (3) Pittsburgh
(7) Indiana over (10) Gonzaga
(2) UCLA over (15) Weber State

East
(1) North Carolina over (16) Eastern Kentucky
(9) Michigan State over (8) Marquette
(12) Arkansas over (5) USC
(4) Texas over (13) New Mexico St.
(11) George Washington over (6) Vanderbilt
(3) Washington State over (14) Oral Roberts
(10) Texas Tech over (7) Boston College
(2) Georgetown over (15) Belmont

South
(1) Ohio State over (16) Central Connecticut
(9) Xavier over (8) BYU
(5) Tennessee over (12) Long Beach State
(4) Virginia over (13) Albany
(6) Louisville over (11) Stanford
(3) Texas A&M over (14) Pennsylvania
(10) Creighton over (7) Nevada
(2) Memphis over (15) North Texas

I’ll do new picks for each round given the winners of the previous round but I wil give my bracket’s final four:

Wisconsin, UCLA, North Carolina, Ohio State. Ohio State over UCLA for the championship.